My Favorite Essays of 2023

My last post of the year! I can’t believe it’s almost 2024.

Since I’m taking the week off, I thought I’d share some of my favorite essays that I’ve written thus far. They’re all linked below.

Hope to see you in the new year at Authenticity Tuesdays, my weekly conversation series where we’ll talk about what authenticity means to you.

I’m also excited to cohost ‘Finding Your Authentic Rhythm’ - a workshop designed to help you recognize your own rhythm as we start the new year, with Nataly Q. Learn more about both offerings here.

Last but not least - I’ll also be having 1:1 conversations with people I admire, to discuss what authenticity means to them. From there, I’ll post an “interview” type blog right here at Wild Cozy Free to share what we discussed! If you’re interested in chatting about this opportunity, just email me at alexajordancoaching@gmail.com

And speaking of coaching…remember that paid subscribers at every level will receive two sixty-minute coaching sessions, now through January 31st.

Okay, that’s it. Onto the essays!

---

In my fantasies, Wild Cozy Free feels like…

• Being a cheetah stalking the Savannah and taking delicious naps under a tree near the watering hole

• Looking out at the ocean from a lighthouse at sunset

• Dancing it out with Meredith, Amelia, Maggie, AND Christina AND Lexie in Grey’s Anatomy (It’s a fantasy because I want all my favorite characters on Grey’s at the same time - alive, successful, and happy. Never going to happen, I know.)

• Changing the world from my couch

Two pictures of the exact same ceiling.

One taken over a longer period of time, and one in a quick bright flash.

I’ve posed for many, many pictures throughout my life. Every stage is well documented. I’ve smiled through many quick bright flashes.

I wonder what the long exposure photos would reveal. Would my own hidden shadows be visible?

I wrote the song below pretty quickly, when I was a little under the weather a few months ago, making my classic go-to remedy: boiling water, fresh lemons, honey, and some apple cider vinegar. The sink was literally full of spoons and knives, and I let my imagination run wild. This is the result! … It’s scary to show a different side of yourself, and delve into an unexpected topic. But the best thing about creativity is the unexpected, to me; when your mind roams in a totally new direction. Sometimes you have to just go along for the ride, and be open to surprising yourself.

I want someone who I can find calm in the chaos with; someone who will find me in the chaos, and tell me that I make sense to them when I feel like an absolute mess. 

Someone who wants to go on adventures and travel, but also loves going back to the hotel room to order takeout, cuddle, and watch Gilmore Girls.

Someone who supports my ambition, and is ambitious themselves, with never-ending curiosity and zest for life.

Someone who will always pause a conversation of any importance to wave at babies and dogs.

Someone who will happily indulge my cheesiness, and also get my sarcasm (ex: you can expect me to ruthlessly make fun of hallmark movies AND likely cry at the end.)

Someone who finds me ‘special in all of my regular-ness’, as Amanda Doyle said on an episode of We Can Do Hard Things.

Someone who tolerates celebrates my wild, cozy, free self, and trusts me to do the same.

Someone who makes me feel held and free.

Being deeply present during my hotel stay and getting in touch with what I loved about those surroundings, led me to a fun fantasy of what my life could look like AND a vision for my future self. I grounded myself into reality, AND envisioned a future beyond my current circumstances. And I found a blueprint to bring back to reality with me.

And now it’s your turn. Try tapping into your own imagination this week. You can dive into a fantasy like I did, and see where that leads you, or dream up something else.

For my realists and/or people who consider themselves “less creative” — you are far more creative than you think.

If you need a jumping off point, here’s a question to get you going, straight from the book of Glennon.

“What is the most beautiful and true life that you can imagine?”

My therapist recently brought up a metaphor, about diving into water without being hyper aware of the ripples you’ll make when you hit the surface.

I immediately knew that I would be diving differently - living differently - if I wasn’t so concerned with the ripples. The big, messy waves. The imminent consequences of living into my truth.

Later on in my session, my coach asked if I wanted to try an exercise. I nodded. Inside, I thought “oh god, here we go.” 

I love a good visualization exercise. It’s a powerful tool that has served me well, and I’ve also created some unique ones for my clients. 

And yet, that afternoon, I found myself afraid to face my own depth, and the truth of what I was really feeling. 

I don’t fully have the words to describe how much I love coaching. How transformational and magical it is. 

I’m still processing the personal growth I experienced throughout this course, and I think I’ll be processing it for quite a while. Definitely more on that later.

But here’s what I know for now.

I didn’t think I’d ever find anything else in life that feels as natural to me as writing does. I was wrong about that. 

I write on my website that I used to think a great coach would have all the answers. I was wrong about that too.

A great coach empowers you to realize that YOU have all of the answers. And I really do believe that’s true.

We run around acting like we’re fine all day long. But when you are up at 3AM and can’t fall back to sleep, it’s like everything you’ve been pushing down swirls all around you. The truth of who you are rises to the surface.

If only we could make space for our truth in the daylight hours more often.

A lot of people think becoming a more authentic version of themselves requires a full overhaul of their lives. Like in Eat Pray Love, or Untamed. There’s this idea that the discovery of your most authentic life will cost you, and I think we sometimes tend to focus on the loss instead of the gain.

There is a lot of truth to the saying that “your new life is going to cost you your old one.”

But also, it’s not always that black and white.

Of course, I don’t actually really believe that any one life is “better” than another.

Except if I’m feeling particularly depressed or anxious. In that case, I really will write you an English essay on why a girl with longer hair than mine has a better life than me. Sure, I only saw her for .5 seconds as we were crossing the street in opposite directions. But I could just tell. Her life is better. I’ll build a thesis from there.

Last but not least, if you want something to holiday-specific to read, or if you’re looking for some book/tv/music recommendations -

These are my meandering, authentic, wild cozy free thoughts as we enter the holiday season and spring towards 2024. This is what I would want to read if my flight was delayed, or if I was hiding from distant relatives in the bathroom.”

(Part 1 is linked in the essay above.)

---

That’s it from me. I’ll see you in 2024.

PS - tell me a moment you’re proud of from this past year or something you’re looking to next year in the comments.